Today will be better

It’s raining outside but the temperature is perfect. You can actually open the window and feel a sense of relief. For some reason all I feel is a burden. I scheduled my first therapy in 4 years yesterday. I think its time. I think its time to look at myself in the form my 4 year old does. I am strong enough to function. I do not need any validation. But if I get a notification I run for the approval.
Today will be better I said yesterday but I forgot how to breath walking down the stairs to my desk at work. When I sat down I automatically knew what was happening. Its 2012 all over again and the panic attack thinks it has permission to consume me from time to time. The shadows of depression lurk as well but Im learning how to turn the light on as soon as it knocks on my door. So Today will be a better day. The opinions of others wont hurt me and I will thrive in my own light. I am enough.

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